the trouble with packing

so here I am again
a strange town
a different place a new home
pack and unpack is what I do
you might almost say
i have a degree in moving
a masters in mulling over memories
brought back to mind
in the sorting of the past
which to let go
which to hold close
wrap it up
held safe in tissue and bubble wrap
boxed transported
then unwrapped again
each new place is different
each memory is the same
others settle and grow roots
my life is motion
new faces new experiences
to incorporate
in all the places of yesterday
do I wish a life more stable
more the same
do I long for friends so far away
for family and familiar faces
I always have I always will
but I am only me
because the road of life
has always called my name

Copyright © 2018 by Eryll Oellermann

we will wait in wild places

what do I want in life

I have lived so long

and walked so many miles

along the road of living

and I believed

I needed no more

I had it all

enough

a life well lived

and then you my love

you found me and loved me

my heart grew young once more

and I knew love

passion and desire

for you brought with you

sunshine and laughter

unfamiliar music and the taste of france

you carry with you a magic

which beguiles me

to me you are an enchantment

an enigma

I would wish to spend my life

with you

we will wander together

through this world

so beautiful

we will walk wooded paths

through sunlight and shadow

hear the call of the wild things

who hide beyond vision

feel the sand

rough beneath our shoeless feet

we will hear the waves greet the shore

watch the sea foam swirl and separate

around our bare legs

we will stand in awe

and whisper back to the mountains

which call us to them

in the warmth of a summer night

we will dance

alone beneath the moon

and rejoice in the majestic silence

of the dark sky

starlit

together

we will wait in wild places

and watch

hand in hand

30^th July 2019

Copyright © 2019 by Eryll Oellermann

the wind and her servants

anjd the voices of the past

spoke to me

through the wind and her servants

sometimes a whisper

almost as silent

as a wordless wraith

at others a banshee screaming aloud

of the  pain and hopelessness

of lost futures

they spoke through the trees

arms outstretched

as the wind formed music from their thoughts

remember me

when you feel the breeze upon your skin

know me again when I take the air from your lungs

with the force of my passion

for i am all

and always have been

the past the present the future

Copyright © 2018 by Eryll Oellermann

who ...

who are you

for me you are ...

sunlight and shade

the first song

of nature's awakening

the rush of winter wind

which steals my breath away

white sands, blue seas

dolphins surfing translucent waves

you bring me

the magic of our incredible world

the sound of your voice

familiar poetry

the love in your eyes 

my heart's desire

no beginning, no end

the gods of love

bring priceless offerings

unexpected joys

the unforgettable experience

of loving you

welcome home

my anam cara 

Copyright ©  Eryll Oellermann 2017

Coucou my darling – I miss you.

I miss holding your hand and the way you squeeze mine.

I miss standing in the kitchen holding you, touching your sweet lips with mine…

that frisson of excitement, the magical emotion of soul joining.

I miss your fabulous French cooking, our evening walks.

I miss your goodbye when you leave for work in the morning and I miss the delight I feel when you return home at the end of the day.

I miss Fifi and the sunshine, shutters that actually close and tomato salad.

I love that I have learned the secret of your salad dressing is French mustard.

I love that I have learned a few French words and the way you teach me the correct pronunciation.

I love windows that open inwards – what a marvelous idea!

So many new experiences, new places, new tastes …

Brought to me by one fabulous French women.

Thank you Marie-Ange for being you.

I love the way you are, who you are and most of all I love the way you make me feel.

Eryll

25th September 2017

My woman, my wife

my breath, my life

you came in the Summer

a stranger unknown

so very French

so young

too young for me

and yet

we played and laughed

we travelled and ate

we shared music and memories

until time no longer mattered

and we crossed the line

into the realm of love forbidden

I have loved you

through the browning gold

of Autumn

and through the long dark

of leafless Winter

I learned to love you

in absence, through distance

soon the first green of Spring

will burst the dormant buds

and I will once more

hold you in my arms

beloved woman

owner of my heart

Copyright © 2018 by Eryll Oellermann

no sleep comes to me

for my words have brought her pain

and she

strong as steel

yet fragile as a baby bird

fallen too soon from the nest

she turns from me

eryll oellermann  3rd January 2019

I will find you in the darkest night 

your soul calls to mine

your heart sings to me

of all our tomorrows

from the first time our eyes met

i have wanted nothing but your love

your hands whispering  to me

every touch a simple tale

of triumph

of a love which never dies

eryll oellermann 

3rd february 2019

the waiting

I have waited all my life

to hear the whisper of your love

and now

as leafless trees stand sombre black

against the winter sky

I feel the sounds of spring

a universal leap to life

for now, the waiting over

I hear your love proclaimed

my unbelieving ended

I am whole

for you are she

the one I waited for, unknowing

that I waited

eryll oellermann 6^th February 2019

who are you

who are you french woman

a mystery for me to solve

a love letter from the universe

a lesson waiting to be learned

the source of my torment and delight

the seducer of my body

the occupier of my mind 

the owner of my heart

you are all these things and more

you are my twin soul

my other half

the end of my searching

the beginning of our love song

a thought shared

a hand holding tight

you are all i have ever longed for

there abides inside me now

a lonely place, a missing

which only you can fill

i had no idea this space existed

until i held you in my arms

and then i understood

that i had wanted you, waited for you

all the years before we met

i grow to know you a little my love

each day you fill my heart more

i learn to understand the ways of you

sometimes too slowly

at times too fast

my heart fills and expands

with the treasure of our love

the magical possibilities of us

you are my passion, my love

my thoughts, my desire

i am yours in ways

you may never understand

feel free and feel safe

you no longer need to walk alone

who am I… with your consent

I am your life's companion

eryll oellermann 20^th February 2019

before time

I did not choose to love you

no more than I chose to be born

and of course once we are born

we do not choose to die

there is no matter of choice

only a certain inevitability

we are who we are, where we are

on the whole life happens to us

if we are wise

we learn to swim with the current

so no, I did not choose to love you

your occupation of my heart and mind

my delight in your body

my overwhelming need to be in your company

these are my destiny

written in the stars before time

eryll oellermann

30^th November 2017

a dreamer

no one shall have too much happiness…

if your heart catches fire

your caress becomes a prayer

her softness yields

and you swirl together

coffee and cream

a gentle perfection which leads the mind

to imagine forever

know fear

for we are not the same

she the very epitome of self sufficiency

and I

who am i

a dreamer of impossibilities

eryll oellermann december 2017

french tomatoes

french tomatoes were not the first french thing I fell in love with

they are, however, way up there

with french girls and grapes and sunshine

i’m joking, of course

about the girls …

there will only ever be

one french girl for me

we did not even meet in france

we met on a dreich scottish day

at glasgow airport

we were vague facebook friends

introduced by another mutual vague facebook friend

the internet has extended life’s possibilities

in almost unbelievable ways

and so it happened

that after some time in her company

much laughter and many conversational misunderstandings

I fell in love with the french girl

and even more astounding

she with me!

She came she left and soon enough

I flew to france and discovered

french tomatoes

the french grow vegetables and fruit trees

but especially

french tomatoes

big, red, firm and delicious

unlike any other tomato I have ever tasted

sliced in a salad

with vinaigrette hand made by my french woman

ooh lah lah

one is never too old

to discover a new delight

in this wonderful world

Copyright © 2018 by Eryll Oellermann

the prelude to pain

an ache with no answer

a pressure on my chest

not a heart attack – heart ache

unending

oh I try

deflect the negativity

which is the prelude to pain

positive thinking

again and again

but the reality is real

she and me

we were two sides of the same coin

interchangeable, yin and yang

opposite and attracted

very little in common

yet bound by the joining

of minds and hearts

an unexpected love

overwhelming

breaking down the barriers of culture and age

distance separated us and yet

she was my constant companion

beneath my skin, in the very fibres of my body

the beat of my heart

the coursing of my blood

the music of her

held all of me enthralled

prisoner of so much more than desire

passion drew us to one another

an unquestionable, magnetic power

and then the giving

the surrender to a love

so sweet, so unforgettable

undeniably

a forever love

and now I live in the silence

of without her

14^th April 2019

Copyright © 2019 by Eryll Oellermann